Possible (But Unlikely) Sports Headlines For Tomorrow
- Brady Ascends To Heaven After Patriots Victory
- Belichick Shakes Coughlin’s Hand And Gets Punched In Face
- Giant Upset! The Hand Of God Helps Elisha in Giants Win
- These Guys Again? Yeah Pats Won
- Earth Swallows Patriots, Giants Win By Forfeit
- Lesnar Taps, Brady By Submission
- Randy Moss Wins MVP, Shakes His Dick At The Trophy
- Entire ‘72 Dolphins Team Commits Cult Suicide After Patriots’ Victory
- Shula’s Dolphins Challenge Patriots To Cage Match At Wrestlemania
- Eli Named MVP After Giants’ Win, Peyton Interviewed And Given Trophy
- Patriots Win, Linebackers Retired To Nursing Home After Game
- Giants Win, Michael Strahan, “I’m Going to Dentist Land!”
- After Patriots Loss, Brady Morphs Into Cloverfield Monster And Destroys Arizona
- Brady Announces Candidacy For Presidency After Pats Victory, Belichick Shows Secret Tapes Of Obama and Hillary
- Mercury Morris Finally Shuts The Hell Up
Have a great Super Bowl Sunday Everyone! Back with more tomorrow!