ThreeStrikesandOut

The baseball movie weekend marathon that started yesterday with Bull Durham, continued today with that epitome of Charlie Sheen goodness, Major League.  Just like Bull Durham did, watching this movie for the eight millionth time brought some thoughts into my small little mind:

• Corbin Bernsen was hurt the most by the cancellation of LA Law.
• Mitch Williams is totally owed royalties from this movie.
• This movie came out in 1989, still no Indians’ World Series title.
• Rene Russo is always doable.
• Bob Ueker is the Dick Vitale of baseball.  Entertaining to a select few, annoying to many, many, more than that.
• If Lou Brown had been coaching the Yankees, they would have won a World Series in the last five years.
• Sammy Sosa + Voodoo + “Bat afraid of curveball”= Pedro Cerrano
• Wesley Snipes played a character that didn’t kill anybody?  Who let that happen?
• If Jake Taylor and Crash Davis had a drinking contest who would win?
• Who’s been in jail more times; Rick Vaughn or Charlie Sheen?

Yawn.  Other than Duke/Carolina later tonight, there’s not much going on today.  So with baseball season coming up soon (I know spring training’s going on, but that doesn’t count, half those jabronis will be filming Major League 7 by June) I got the itching for some baseball and what better to fill that niche than the greatest baseball movies of all time.  Bull Durham started out my marathon and reminded of the following things:

• Kevin Costner used to be funny.
• Susan Sarandon used to be kind of doable
• The sight of Tim Robbins dressed up in garters and a jock strap while pitching has reduced my vision by about 30 percent everytime I’ve watched.  If I watch it one more time I will officially be Stevie Wonder.
• If Costner had stuck to making baseball movies, instead of crap like Waterworld, he would probably be my favorite actor, right above that guy that did all those midget pornos.
• If Crash Davis had used HGH he might have been a 20-25 homer man in “The Show”.
• Both this movie and Major League involve the killing of live chickens to remove curses.
• The “I love the small of a woman’s back” speech may be one of the best ever in any movie and it pisses me off to no end that all that I could find was the edited version.